Has the passion in your relationship fizzled? Would you say you are in a sexless marriage? Do you long for him to desire you again? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you are not alone. Tons of women experience a sexless, passionless marriage or relationship every day.
I am here to help you restore the passion in your relationship and make him desire you again!
As women, we have a yearning to feel desired by our partners. We are passionate creatures by nature with a need to feel more than just an emotional connection in our relationships.
Ever feel deceived by the man in your life?
Remember back when he was trying desperately to get in your pants? During that period he made you feel like there was no one else like you. “No one compares to you” was what I heard often early in my relationship. In the beginning, men have us on cloud nine.
Men give us exactly what we need to feel desired when they are courting us. Early on in the relationship, it seems men cannot get enough of us. If they had it their way they would jump our bones every second of the day.
If you are like me, you are probably thinking what changed? Where did all that passion and desire go in a few years?
Unfortunately, life has a way of getting in the way. The longer you are in a relationship with someone the more routine it becomes. At this point, one or both partners in the relationship become complacent. For many, there is a point where companionship is just enough and there seems to be no room for all the wild sexcapades you once had.
I can go on and on about the many reasons you are in a sexless relationship. However, I will not bore you with that. I will leave all the technical information to psychologytoday.com. So, don’t worry ladies, Just continue reading below for a list of various ways to make him desire you again.
How to make him desire you again –
Finally, I’ve gotten to the good part, the reason you have taken the time to read so far.
Fall in love with yourself.
Yes, I said this and it may be cliche however it’s true. It is very important that you love yourself as a woman. You should fall in love with everything about yourself. Remember who you are or find yourself again. This is the first step in making him desire you again.
See yourself as God’s gift because you are. Look at yourself in the mirror and compliment yourself starting with what you like least about yourself. Remind yourself, that you chose him because he proved to desire you the most. That has not changed. All that changed are the circumstances surrounding your relationship.
Once you adjust those circumstances to your benefit, he will desire you again, much more than ever before.
Be confident.
When you are looking in the mirror say these words to yourself “I am that Bitch”. Yes, you are that bitch. He may be acting cold and distant now but he chose you for all your extraordinary characteristics. It may have been the way you wrinkle your nose when you laugh or the way you chew with your mouth open. No matter what that characteristic is, it makes you stand out from every other woman on this earth. So be confident in who you are and all your quirks.
Don’t be afraid to reinvent yourself.
If for some reason you are not happy with what you see in the mirror get a makeover. Sometimes we may need a little extra motivation to gain that confidence and love for ourselves back. This is ok, as long as you are doing this for yourself and not for him only.
Figure out what you want to change about yourself. Perhaps, it’s a new haircut, a new wardrobe, or a new ass. What you decide to do to reinvent yourself is up to you. Just do whatever makes you happy, confident, and fall in love with yourself. Show him the new you and I guarantee he will most certainly desire you again.
Don’t sweat the small stuff.
If your man is acting like a bump on a log, don’t sweat it. Often times the more you pursue something the quicker it will run from you. Focus on yourself. Don’t chase him or bring up the lack of sex continuously. Spend most of your time on yourself. Remember, men love to chase. Make him chase you again. Once he notices you start loving yourself, become more confident, and reinvent yourself he will not want to leave your side again.
Give him space.
Let your man enjoy his space and even have time with the boys. This just reiterates you not sweating the small stuff. What I am saying is don’t nag him. Of course, you can bring up your concerns. However, once you have voiced your concerns give him space to process your concerns with a clear mind.
How to make him desire more of you – the sexy stuff
In the first section above I went over the first few strategies you should take when working on making your man desire you again. Those strategies are focused on you getting into a better space mentally and emotionally so that you can execute any of the following sexy strategies flawlessly.
There will be no way will resist any of these strategies from the confident, new, and improved you.
Disclaimer: Do not hold me responsible because you put these strategies to the test and your man starts chasing you around the house trying to jump your bones every chance he gets.
Dress sexy, especially for bed.
Let all that confidence and love you have for yourself become visible through your attire.
Years ago my husband requested that I dress sexier for bed. You see although my attire and underwear were always sexy, I didn’t dress sexy for bed. In the past, I went to bed in outerwear. Back then I wore leggings or jogging pants and a long sleeve shirt to bed. I was always fully dressed just in case there was a fire in the middle of the night. I didn’t want the neighbors to see me in sexy bedclothes.
He explained to me my bedclothes were a turnoff for him. Although he may have been turned on by my attire all-day, my bedclothes were like an off switch. Needless to say, I stopped wearing full attire to bed and turned his switch back on.
If you want him to desire you again, the sexier the attire the better. You might want to show him some sexy clothes and lingerie online and have him tell you what his preference is. Surprise him with the outfit and lingerie of his choice and watch him begin lusting over you again.
Flirt with him.
You gave him all the space he needed and you didn’t sweat the small stuff. Now it’s time to remind him that you are that bitch. Channel that inner vixen and lay the flirting on thick.
It’s time to go back to your bag of tricks. Don’t tell me you don’t have any. You got him, didn’t you? If you want him to desire you again, it’s time to get to work. Treat him like you would a man you are trying to get to know.
Be kind and sweet. Turn on the damsel in distress act. Shoot him a sexy smile from across the living room or from the kitchen. Brush against him while he is sitting on the sofa watching tv. and pretend it was an accident.
Take your clothes off and throw them in the wash and let him catch you in your underwear. Come to bed in just a thong or any sexy underwear you own, claiming that it’s too hot for pajamas.
Remind him why you married him. Kiss him in his favorite spot, only you know where that is. Lick him in your favorite spot. Let him hear you tell someone what you love so much about him.
The point is to be obvious. He should be fully aware that you have turned on the charm.
Send him sexy, fun texts throughout the day.
One of the easiest ways to ensure that your man will desire you again is to work on him throughout the entire day. Technology makes this super easy. Surprise him while he’s at work with sexy, fun, flirty texts.
Send him short provocative messages. Text him that you are thinking about the last time you went down on him. Tell him how you can still taste his cum in your mouth. Remind him how wet he makes you. Share with him how you may have to take a short break because the thought of him has you aroused. Be as sexy as you can be. If you are not used to talking like this practice
Don’t be shy. You reinvented yourself and you know you look good. Make sure to include a few sexy selfies with those texts. If you are at work, take a sexy selfie in the lady’s room and send it to him. Make sure he is certain of what will be waiting for him once he gets home.
The goal is to have him thinking about fucking you all day. This sexy conversation guarantees he will desire you again.
Be open-minded about his fetishes and desires.
Often times men have fetishes and desires they are afraid or ashamed to share with anyone. Maybe he enjoys watching porn, tying you up, or has a fantasy of videotaping the two of you having sex. As his wife or girlfriend, you should be open-minded and hear him out.
Give your man the opportunity to present to you any fetishes or desires with you. The mere fact that you keep an open mind when he shares with you will allow him to feel a deeper connection to you. You may be surprised and find out that he has the same desires as you. If so great, the two of you can now explore these desires together.
Perhaps, it’s a fetish that you never thought about or were never interested in with someone else. Hear him out and maybe give it a try. Worst-case scenario, you try it and realize it’s not for you. Best case scenario, you try it and love it.
If it is something that you know without a doubt you are not willing to partake in explain to him how you feel. Do this in a way that will not make him feel ashamed as this may be a sensitive subject to him.
Initiate more.
One partner says “We would have more sex if he/she initiated more.” The other partner responds “I would initiate more if I wasn’t rejected all the time.” I hear this a lot from people in sexless marriages. It’s like a vicious cycle. In the meantime, the issue of lack of sex gets no better.
My response to this is just to initiate more. It doesn’t really matter who initiates and who doesn’t. The point here is to get him to desire you again. One thing I know is that you do not miss what you do not have. If you want him to desire you again you have to remind him what he is missing.
Be creative when you are initiating sex. Don’t just ask, or try to plan to have sex. Start being aggressive when initiating sex. Learn how to take advantage of him. What I know for sure is a man will not say no.
Surprise him when you are watching tv together by letting your hand find its way onto his dick and start massaging him. Start kissing his neck or caressing his skin as he watches sports. Draw a bath for him and then jump in there with him. If you want to be really bold unzip his pants, take his dick out, and suck it.
Let’s get intimate
Most of what I have shared in this post comes from my own experience. Being in a long-term marriage I have experienced a sexual draught more than once myself. I have been able to turn it around by being open-minded and willing to work on myself as well as on my marriage.
I hope you have enjoyed reading this post as much as I have enjoyed writing it. As always, I look forward to hearing from you. Please feel free to leave thoughts, suggestions, and experiences in the comments. I would love to hear about steps you may have taken in the past or plan on taking to your sexy back.
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